Hey guys, welcome to the Unshakable Man Podcast: A show and community for men who want to be their best emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual versions of themselves. This show is in the category of emotional awareness and we discuss how the alpha and omega states are expressed, interpreted, and best applied to intimate relationships.
Our guest today is life partner, coach, and sacred intimacy guide, Justin Patrick Pierce. He helps men and women who seek deeper connections in their lives and relationships and guides them to become the change that is required to find that attraction again. You can find him at justinpatrickpierce.com.
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This might be for you if:
- You identify as male and wish to express more vulnerability in your relationships.
- You find it difficult to connect with your emotions and are afraid of expressing them.
- You want to avoid overwhelming and scaring your partner with your vulnerability.
- You want to understand how your personal growth might affect your partner.
- You seek to be in a safe, mutually fulfilling relationship with another person.
Resources:
Books:
Authors/Creators:
We talk about:
- The value of meditation and other spiritual practices.
- Why men’s work is not only about dealing with pain and trauma.
- The impact of childhood abuse on our lives and relationships.
- Sensitivity as a survival mechanism and potential skill.
- Why relationships are important to all people.
- Being driven by dark motivation.
- The difference between the alpha and omega states.
- Getting skilled at shifting between states.
- Unconditional love and acceptance of your partner.
Key Points From This Episode:
- Get a sense of where the conversation is going and the topics that will be covered. [0:02:17]
- Chris checks in and explains the procedure and value of the exercise to Justin. [0:03:53]
- Our guest shares how this work found him and the role his grandfather played in shaping his mind. [0:07:00]
- How Justin meditated from a young age and the different possibilities it opened up to him. [0:09:26]
- Thoughts on the idea that this work is only for people who have suffered pain and trauma. [0:11:35]
- Justin talks about some of his childhood wounds and the extent to which they impact his life and relationships. [0:13:29]
- How you can leverage the skill of sensitivity to improve your spiritual practices. [0:15:53]
- Chris and Justin talk about how their concepts of love have shifted over the years. [0:17:34]
- Why relationship is absolutely important to all of us, despite what we might believe. [0:18:58]
- The idea that successful men tend to be driven by the desire to prove their worth and why it is destructive in the long run. [0:20:00]
- Why there is no cookie-cutter approach to start someone on the journey of rediscovering intimacy and relationship. [0:22:41]
- Justin relates David Deida’s ideas to understanding what is happening in our modern world. [0:24:53]
- The alpha-state and the problem of being detached from your emotions and not expressing them through your body. [0:26:21]
- Learn what the omega state as the essence of the feminine practice involves and how it affects our relationships. [0:28:39]
- Chris shares how being vulnerable has shifted the dynamics of his relationship and caused difficult emotions to surface. [0:32:36]
- Advice for how men can move into an omega-state without unsettling their partner and destroying all polarity. [0:34:34]
- Why change in one partner (even if constructive) is difficult for the other to process and how to overcome the obstacle of one-sided growth. [0:38:02]
- Learning to love and accept your partner for who they are and not keeping them hostage in the story you have created. [0:41:34]
- Justin uses an analogy of a piano to explain how we can shift between different parts of ourselves while retaining our partner’s trust. [0:43:01]
- A picture of how a mature man deals with and integrates his men’s work in his life and relationships. [0:46:16]
Tweetables:
“What we do as mature musicians is we have our piano in front of us with our alpha and omega notes, and we look at our partner we say, “I wonder what note would serve them right now? What do they need me to be right now?” I would love to play this omega note right now, but they don’t need that. Actually, if I played this off a note, their heart would open. They would relax. They would trust me more. They would enjoy my company.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:46:28]
“I just came to the conclusion that anyone who turns off the light and sits still in a room by themselves will discover many of the same things and practices about manipulating the breath, manipulating consciousness, and so on.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:10:51]
“What I’ve found over the years is that men who have experienced different forms of abuse: physical, emotional, psychological, you start to develop a certain sensitivity in your body and mind as well, which turns out to be a gift, if you know how to use that.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:15:06]
“Love should never be associated with any one particular emotion because love is essentially all emotions. Love is everything. Because everything is relationship. Biology is relationship, chemistry is relationship, physics is relationship, science, math is relationship, words are relationship.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:18:38]
“What we need to realize is when your woman feels you go into your emotional authenticity, she’s going to lose trust in you. Omega is not the trustable pole. If we are emoting and being emotional and in an emotional flow and looking for our intimate partner to hold space for us and support us, we cannot in the next moment, expect them to trust us. Those are unreasonable expectations.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:33:47]
“In our maturity, we don’t need others to grow the same way we do. We don’t need others to be on our trip. We don’t need that. We are capable of growing infinitely and still loving people exactly as they are, where they are. My best friends haven’t changed in 20 years. My best friends have no interest in the things I’m interested in. They don’t want to do men’s work. They don’t want to change. They don’t want to learn about intimacy. They hate the stuff and I love these men so much.” — Justin Patrick Pierce [0:39:09]
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Justin Patrick Pierce on Instagram